


Aisle Three

by BonitaBreezy



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: As you do, Complete, M/M, breaking up robberies, drug store shenanigans, this is what happens when you work all the time, told through the eyes of a female OC, your fics become centered around your job
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-08
Updated: 2014-12-08
Packaged: 2018-02-28 15:58:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2738390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BonitaBreezy/pseuds/BonitaBreezy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint and Phil's relationship, told through the eyes of the cashier at the local Duane Reade.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aisle Three

**Author's Note:**

> Totally unbeta'd and written in the wee hours of the morning. I apologize for any mistakes.

“Hi, welcome to Duane Reade,” Tatiana called over her shoulder as the front doors whirred open.  She didn’t bother to look away from her task of facing the hard liquor.  There was a bottle of R&R stuck way at the back of the shelf, and even standing on her tiptoes she could barely brush it with her fingers.

“Hi, first aid section?” a harassed sounding voice asked.

“Go down aisle nine, all the way to the…” she trailed off when she turned around and saw that the man who had asked was half-carrying another man who was bleeding profusely from the head.

“Oh my lord!” she shrieked, making both men wince. “Should I call 911?”

“No, no,” the first man said quickly, frowning down at the bloodstains on his no doubt expensive suit jacket. “He’ll be okay, I just need some bandages and....”

“Aisle nine, all the way down, on the back wall about half way up,” Tatiana recited quickly, watching nervously as suit man left the second guy leaning against register two and raced back to the first aid section.

“You need me to call 911?” she asked the bleeding man, her voice pitched low.  For all she knew there was some sort of unsavory situation going on and he needed help getting away.  Bed Stuy wasn’t the safest of neighborhoods, after all.

“No, no,” the guy said, his eyes looking a bit bleary. “I’m...I’m totally...I’m gonna puke.”

Tatiana hurriedly pulled the garbage can from under the register and thrust it at him.  He barely grabbed it in time before he was throwing up, and she had to look away in order to keep her own dinner down.  Mercifully, the first guy reappeared half a minute later, glancing nervously at his friend and dropping an armful of bandages and gauze on the countertop.

“I think he needs a hospital,” Tatiana offered quietly as she rang the man up as quickly as the temperamental computer would let her.

“I’ll take care of it,” the man assured her. “I appreciate your concern, but I promise I know what I’m doing.”

“Phil, I think I’m gonna pass out,” the first guy said, his words slurring sloppily.

“Fuck,” Phil said passionately.  He tossed a fifty dollar bill on the counter, grabbed his bag, and went to check on his friend.  He tilted his head to the side, inspected it, brushed his fingers very gently through the man’s hair, and then ushered them both out the door.

“Uh,” Tatiana said to the empty storefront.

Finally, not knowing what else to do, she called her manager to find out what she should do with the twenty-two dollars in change they’d left behind.

* * *

 

Life went on as normal, and Tatiana wrote the experience off as one of those weird things that happens when you work in a convenience store.  Homeless people fall asleep in the bathroom, people come in so high or drunk they can’t figure out how to slide their credit card, some crazy white guys set up an ER in front of her register, whatever.

It was nearly two months later in the middle of the daytime lull when the injured man rushed through her front door holding a large mutt in his arms.  He was no longer injured, of course, but the dog definitely looked worse for wear.  It was missing an eye, and its golden fur was matted and a bit patchy in some places.

“Hey, you can’t bring that dog in here!” she said, turning off the vacuum cleaner.  She could hear the dog whining and whimpering pathetically in his arms. “You can’t go back there!”

The man ignored her protests and ducked down behind register one.  He popped back up a second later, staring at the front door.

“Listen, you didn’t see me,” he said, before his head disappeared under the lip of the counter again.

“What the hell--”

Before Tatiana could demand that he get out of her store, the doors whirred open and two mean-looking guys in red tracksuits rushed in, scanning the rows of shelves with scowls on their faces.

“Hey, where’s the guy with the dog?” the short one demanded, his eastern European accent thick.

“We saw him come in girl, don’t lie,” the taller one sneered before she could even open her mouth to answer, and Tatiana found she was suddenly in no mood to help them out.  Girl, indeed.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said, raising her eyebrows at them.

“Guy stole my dog!” the shorter one insisted. “He came in here.”

“You think I wouldn’t notice if a guy and a dog came running in here?” Tatiana demanded, letting go of the vacuum to plant her hands on her hips. “I’m not _stupid_.  Now buy something or get the hell out.”

She was thankful that her manager was in the back office and couldn’t hear her talking to a potential customer that way.  For a moment, the two guys looked like they might just push past her and scour the store anyway, but finally the taller one snorted, barked something in not-English at the other, and they both left.

The guy waited until about thirty seconds after the door had whooshed closed to pop up from behind the counter.  He set the dog down on it, making Tatiana wrinkle her nose, and prodded at it.  The dog let out a sharp, pain-filled whine, but it didn’t lift it’s head to try to snap at the man’s fingers or even to growl in warning.

“He should go to a vet,” Tatiana offered.

“Yeah,” the guy said, frowning. “Yeah, you’re right.  Thanks for letting us hideout.  Those guys were kicking him.”

“Uh-huh,” Tatiana said, because she wasn’t sure what else to say. “Just don’t bring that dog in my store again, you hear me?”

“Yes, ma’am,” the man said, and then he was gone again.

He reappeared the next day with his friend from before, but the dog was nowhere in sight.

“Clint, you can’t just feed the thing pizza all the time,” Phil was saying. “You’ll kill it in less than a year, which would be a damn shame after all that money you’re going to spend in veterinary bills.”

“He _likes_ pizza,” the dog guy, Clint, insisted. “And it’s got meat on it.  Dogs like meat.”

“Pizza is probably worse for the dog than it is for you,” Phil insisted. “If you’re going to keep that mangy mutt, you need to get him some decent dog food, and probably some toys so he’ll stop chewing on your furniture.  Although to be honest, your couch is terrible enough that a few bite marks might only improve it.”

“Okay, firstly the doctor gave Lucky medicine for the mange,” Clint told him, scowling, “and secondly, that couch is awesome, okay?  It’s literally the most comfortable couch in the history of mankind.”

“It smells like sour milk,” Phil responded dryly. “Hi, where can we find pet supplies?”

It took Tatiana a moment too long to realize that he was talking to her.

“Oh,” she said. “Uh...aisle six, all the way back on the right side.”

They continued to bicker as they headed towards the pet aisle, and Tatiana watched them with interest.  On the surface, it seemed like they didn’t even like each other that much, but the more she watched them, the more it seemed obvious that they were actually enjoying arguing with each other.  They reappeared ten minutes later with a large sack of dog food, a leash, a big plush dog bed, a variety of dog toys, and a large bottle of Febreze.

“I don’t even need the fabric stuff,” Clint was insisting as Phil set it on the countertop.

“Trust me, if you’re going to insist on keeping that couch, you really do,” Phil said, flashing a small smile at Tatiana.  She smiled a bit hesitantly back.

“That’s $103.86,” she said when she’d finished ringing up their purchases.

Clint let out a low whistle, and then reached out to grab Phil’s wrist when he went to slide his credit card.

“Hey, what are you doing?” he demanded.

“Paying?” Phil asked innocently.

“You’re gonna spend a hundred bucks on my dog that you don’t even like?” Clint asked skeptically.

“I don’t dislike Lucky,” Phil told him, frowning as he freed his arm and swiped his card. “And anyway, even if I didn’t, you’d be devastated if something happened to that animal under your care.”

“Well, yeah,” Clint said, rubbing the back of his neck and shifting awkwardly. Tatiana felt like maybe she should join him in his awkward shifting.  It was almost like they’d forgotten she was there at all. “But I mean…”

“I like you,” Phil said simply. “And I don’t want to see you upset.”

Phil, too busy answering the million questions the keypad asked of him, didn’t see the brilliant blush that flooded Clint’s face, or the way he smiled bashfully down at the carpet, but Tatiana certainly did.

* * *

 

“Are those the guys?” Lindsay hissed under her breath as Clint and Phil argued over whether they should get chocolate glazed or powdered donettes.

“Those are the guys,” Tatiana confirmed.

“You’re right, they are totally in love with each other,” Lindsay said. “Do you think they’re dating?”

“I think they’re the most clueless people I’ve ever met in my life,” Tatiana sighed. “They come in here all the time and they actually gaze lovingly at each other when the other isn’t looking.  It’s really pathetic.”

“I think it’s cute,” Lindsay gushed, watching as Clint broke into a dopey smile when Phil rolled his eyes and tossed the bag of powdered donettes in to their basket.

“Hi, welcome to Duane Reade,” Tatiana and Lindsay called in unison when the doors whooshed open.  Neither of them looked away from where Clint and Phil had started arguing over whether they should order pizza or Chinese as they turned the corner and headed towards the beer coolers.

“It’s kind of fascinating, really,” Lindsay said. “Like...do they always bicker like that?”

“Yep,” Tatiana said. “I’m kind of waiting for them to just start making out like in a movie or something.”

“Hmm,” Lindsay said.

“Stop imagining them making out,” Tatiana commanded.  Lindsay shot her an unrepentant grin.

“Alright listen up!”

Both girls jumped in surprise at the shouted command.  Two guys who had just come in stood in front of the doors with ski masks pulled over their faces.  Tatiana’s heart caught in her throat when she realized that they were holding guns, and one of them was pointed directly at her.

“Everyone get the fuck down on the floor or I’m gonna shoot this bitch in the face!”   The two stoners who had been contemplating the M&M’s display immediately hit the floor and did their best to hide behind the table.  It was late, and there were only four customers in the store, but she couldn’t see Clint and Phil, which meant the robbers couldn’t either.  She hoped one of them would be able to call the cops.

“Open the register,” the guy with the gun on her commanded.

“Yeah, okay,” Tatiana said slowly.  She could feel Lindsay trembling next to her leg down where she’d dropped to the floor. She tried to remember everything she’d learned in training about what to do in the event of a robbery and she avoided making eye contact.

“I’m just gonna put in the command to open the register,” she said, reaching slowly towards the computer.

“Hurry up!” the guy snarled, and Tatiana couldn’t help but reflexively look up at him in annoyance.  As soon as she did, she saw something that seriously surprised her.  Clint had the second robber in a sleeper hold and was silently lowering his unconscious form to the floor as Phil crept up behind the one in front of her.

Apparently, she looked too long, because the robber frowned and glanced over his shoulder to find Phil reaching for him.  He spun and aimed the gun, but he didn’t get a chance to pull the trigger before Phil had him by the wrist.  

He did some weird Vulcan-pinch move thing to his wrist that made the guy’s fingers slacken around the gun.  It dropped out of his hand and hit the floor hard, making Tatiana flinch.  It didn’t go off, though.  Phil, meanwhile, forced the guy around by twisting his arm up behind his back and slammed the man’s face into countertop hard enough that she heard the bone in his nose crunch.  He let the guy drop to the floor and turned to look at Clint, who was coming back up aisle ten.

“Clear, sir,” Clint said, and Phil nodded.

“Did you call the police?” he asked.

“Yes, sir,” Clint answered, and Tatiana found herself startled by this sudden change in them.  They were no longer the flirty friends, but more like co-workers instead.  There was no sign of playful bickering, just all business.

They dragged the two guys over to register two and zip-tied their hands behind their backs, because apparently Clint just carried zip ties around in his pockets, which totally wasn’t scary at all.

“They police should be here in a few minutes,” Phil told her, and his serious and stern mask slipped away for a second to reveal a gentle smile. “Are you all right?”

“I don’t know,” Tatiana answered honestly.

She’d always kind of thought of herself as a bad bitch, but she hadn’t felt so bad when there’d been a gun shoved in her face.  Phil leaned down and scooped the gun off the floor.  He broke it down quickly and easily, like he did that sort of thing all the time, and then set the pieces on the countertop.  Clint brought him the second one and he broke that down, too.

“We’re going to go,” Phil said. “They should stay unconscious for a while, so you don’t have to worry about them getting back up.”

“But...shouldn’t you stay?” Tatiana asked.  She resisted the urge to look down at Lindsay, who was still huddled against her leg on the floor.  She could hear her sniffling back the tears and didn’t want to draw attention to how afraid she was. “I mean, the cops…”

“Trust me, it will be much easier all around if we’re not here when the cops show up,” Phil assured her. “It’s a jurisdictional thing.”

“Oh,” Tatiana said, even though she wasn’t sure what he meant by that.  Maybe he and Clint were FBI or something?  It had to be some sort of law enforcement, with the way they’d quickly and efficiently taken those robbers out. “Um, okay.  Did you, uh, want your donuts?”

“No, thanks,” Phil said, smiling again. “We’ll be alright.  And so will you.  Good night.”

They left together, walking in step like they’d planned it out, and Tatiana just watched them go, unsure of what to make of the pair of them.

“What the fuck just happened, man?” one of the stoners asked incredulously.

All Tatiana could offer him was a helpless shrug.

* * *

 

“Okay, I’ll get the candy, you get the pizza and beer,” Phil was saying as he and Clint entered through the front doors.

“Get me Red Vines or cherry pull-apart Twizzlers,” Clint responded, already heading towards the cooler section as Phil ducked in to aisle five. “Don’t get me any of that strawberry crap, Coulson.”

“What about chocolate?” Phil called.

“M&M’s, we can mix them in the popcorn!  Oh, we need popcorn!  Tatiana!”

“Aisle nine!” she called to Clint, who she could hear slamming doors in aisle ten.

She’d gotten so used to Clint and Phil showing up at random times for random reasons that she’d stopped even questioning them.  Mostly she just watched, amused, as they bickered and joked about everything under the sun as they bought what they needed.  If she and Lindsay had gotten pretty much all of their co-workers invested in an informal betting pool about when they’d finally get together, well.  No one had to know.

They met up again at her register, Phil piling two bags of M&M’s, plain and pretzel, a box of Red Vines, and a package of Twizzlers on the counter, followed quickly by Clint who added two boxes of Digiorno, a six pack of PBR (which made Phil roll his eyes), and a box of movie-theater butter popcorn.

“Are you guys having a movie night?” she asked, raising her eyebrows at the mass of junk food.

“Lord of the Rings marathon,” Clint told her, grinning.

“Wow.  Nerdy.”

“Don’t judge, Tat,” Clint told her. “We are going to have an epic night in Middle Earth while you’re asking if everyone and their mother has a rewards card, so…”

“Point,” Tatiana conceded, but she was still a bit miffed at having to admit he was right so as she was handing over their change she added, “So have you two finally started dating, or is this just a friends thing?”

“Uh,” Clint sputtered, his face going red.  Phil’s ears had gone a spectacular shade of pink, and Tatiana had to squash down her grin at how embarrassed and uncomfortable they looked.

“Because, I mean, the sexual tension has just been so obvious…”

“Okay, bye!” Clint said loudly.  He grabbed their bags and quickly headed out the door, leaving Phil to flounder in silence for a long moment before following after him.

Tatiana had enough grace to wait until the doors slid shut behind him to start laughing.

* * *

After Tatiana didn’t see them again for a few days, she started to worry that maybe she’d been out of line.  She’d just wanted to embarrass them a little, not chase them away entirely.  And for all she knew, she’d made things awkward between them and they weren’t even talking to each other.

Three weeks after she’d made her joke, they came stumbling through the door on a Thursday night, about ten minutes before close.  She considered, for half a second, apologizing to them, but then she saw the pleasant flush of their faces and the way they held each other’s hands, seeming unwilling to let go.  They kept shooting little glances at each other and grinning widely with every look and they were pressed in to each other’s personal space, like it was all they could do to stand that small distance apart from each other.  Phil glanced at her, his face pinking a little bit more.

“Condoms?” he asked.

Tatiana couldn’t bite back her smirk.

“Aisle three,” she said. “All the way back.”


End file.
